Why can’t you change?

Why can't you change?

Why can’t you change?

I will try to answer this and other related questions in the following text!

You wake up on the same side of the bed every morning. You get up the same way. You brush your teeth with the same technique. You go to work the same way as before. You come to work and do all the things you do day in and day out for weeks, months and years. You look at the same people who constantly annoy you in the same way. You have lunch mostly at speed every day. You return home the same way. You turn on the same TV channel or switch from one to another and so on in a circle. The same thoughts run through your head. You talk to the same people about the same things. You lie down to sleep with the same bitterness as the day before. Like in the famous movie “Marmot Day” in which a grumpy journalist, dissatisfied with the task he gets every morning, wakes up and lives the same day over and over again – exactly the day he likes the least.

Many people live on the same day for several years or even decades. They do the same things, they think the same way, they feel and react the same, secretly hoping for something new, some change from the outside. They expect something to happen, even though they know it won’t happen.

And do you know what everyone who lives this way has in common? What all of them have in common is that so far they have tried to change what is beyond their power, what they cannot influence. Instead of dealing with themselves and their decisions, they spend much more energy on circumstances and people because of which they do not feel well, and which they cannot change. We often have models that we are not even aware of, we believe that something is as it is, that is, that the reality we see is the only correct one – the only real one. And that is exactly why we can find ourselves stuck in a vicious circle of life for a long time, trying to change others, circumstances or something else. The first step towards change is not change, but the awareness that we need to change.

Why can't you change?

The beginning of change

We all experience days when we feel like we don’t have the motivation and energy to get out of bed. Yet, no matter how it sounds to you now, it is an illusion. We always have more than enough energy, and I will prove it to you with an example: imagine sitting at home and you are bored. Looking for a movie to watch, you know you have a lot of work to do but pretend not to see it and you just have the impression that you can’t move off the couch. And then your phone rings and your best friend calls you for a drink. It’s as if everything changed in an instant, you got energy and enthusiasm, you get dressed at lightning speed and you jump.

From this example, we see that energy has always been there, but it lacked a driver. It’s the same with motivation, it’s always there. But then what is missing? Many think that they lack self-confidence (see also: Lack of self-confidence – read every word well!, What is self-confidence and how to increase it?, Facts you didn’t know about self-confidence?!, Principles of self-confidence), many believe that they are trapped in the circumstances in which they were born, some others think that things are unchangeable. What was missing in the above example and in others who want change is “good reason”! When it is reached, all delays, all answers, all grumpiness, all nonsense, as well as lack of energy, stop. The goal of my site and every good life coach is to help people come up with key answers?! After that, some new life energy begins to flow through them, which leads them to success, satisfaction and freedom. Why can't you change?

People give up when they don’t have a strong enough reason to do something. While it sounds simple and you may believe you have good reasons, but you just can’t go against circumstances or people who don’t understand you and who might make fun of you, I still urge you to forget for a moment all that you keep repeating to yourself.

Do just one simple exercise that, if you dedicate yourself to it, will lead you to some key, vital answers. I want you to imagine for a moment what your life would look like in a year if you don’t give up on yourself and your plans now. Imagine that, no matter how you feel now, you are starting to achieve your goals and plans at this moment. Imagine being capable and being able to accomplish anything you want. What would your life look like then? How would you feel? What would you look like? Imagine that everyone supports you and congratulates you on your success. You have proven to yourself and others that you are capable. What has changed in your life if so? What does your life look like in a year if you meet him today?

And now I want you to forget all that and imagine what your life would look like if you gave up today and said – “it’s not the right time yet, the conditions haven’t been met, I’m not ready enough, maybe next year”. If you gave up your ideas, dreams and plans and continued as before for the next year, what would your life look like then? How would you feel? How would that affect your relationships, your family, your job, your finances? Answer yourself honestly to these questions and compare these two answers. Life is too short to put it off. Waiting for better weather, perfect conditions, more favorable circumstances, you may wake up again with the feeling that it is always the same day as in “Groundhog Day”. Do not be angry then about the circumstances and the people, the past and the experiences. Make some new decisions, and the most important decision is that you will not waste a single day of your precious life. You are made for great things. You have many ideas. There is a potential in you that wants to be expressed and that you have been silencing for so long. That’s why you feel anxious. Not because you are not capable but because you are not using your abilities.

Why can't you change?

The power is in you!

We often have the impression that we have no power over many things in our lives and that stops us from achieving our goals. We dream of starting our own business, applying for high positions with great responsibility, public appearances, but we are prevented from doing so by self-criticism due to previous mistakes, weaknesses or shortcomings. And so, for the umpteenth time, our success slips out of our hands.

The root of the lack of strength, will and motivation can lie in the way we are brought up and the environment in which we grew up. We are all born carefree, free, fearless, and then standards are imposed on us as we should be, what to do, how to behave in accordance with the norms and expectations of society. Thus, we gradually forget our needs and begin to make decisions in accordance with the needs of others.

Have you ever thought that you are strong, talented, capable and confident?

Living by your own standards and being in line with your truth – that’s what we call self-confidence!

Whatever you accept in life, self-confidence and faith in success are key to achieving satisfaction. Self-confidence is achieved by practicing and mastering certain skills. The more you learn, the more confident you are in your knowledge, what you do and what you say, the less you doubt yourself, the more capable you feel. If you don’t feel safe in a field, it’s because there is still a lot to learn. Mastering what is unknown and improving your abilities and skills means regaining faith in yourself and feeling powerful.

Turn obstacles into challenges! Learn how instead of “I can’t do it, there’s no way”, think “OK, this seems interesting to me, how can I achieve that”.

Why can't you change?

Change the way you think, but above all, the way you see yourself. Do not constantly burden yourself with your shortcomings, because in that way you will only increase them more and more in your consciousness. It is good to make them aware, but it is not good to constantly focus on them. Instead, focus on your virtues and the ways in which you can improve your knowledge, behavior, skills, and abilities. Practice looking the interlocutor in the eye, straighten your shoulders, listen to your interlocutors carefully. Take it step by step. What do you look like when you are confident in yourself? Just as you read this, take that position. It may seem strange, untrue, as if it weren’t you. Don’t give up on exercise because of that. Our body and our mind are inextricably linked. By changing your posture over time, you will also begin to feel different.

 

 

I hope you liked the content about the changes?

If you have any questions or suggestions, please leave them in the comments!

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